Yesterday my friend Nick, whose frequent phone conversations are well documented in the previous post, called to tell me that he had won the first annual AU College Republican $5K Scholarship. He quoted the person who delivered the news to Nick as saying, "We gave you the scholarship because of your incredible letters of recommendation." Now, letter of recommendation are always useful, but it just so happens that I wrote one of those letters, and while I should be happy that my eloquent prose achieve it's desire effect in bringing Nick yet another scholarship, my sinful reaction was quite different.
(Jason and his sinning face... if only it were that easy to tell)
WHY IS IT THAT WHEN I STRUGGLE TO ACHIEVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, HE MANAGES STRIDE THROUGH LIFE UPON WAVE AFTER WAVE OF SUCCESS! WHY IS IT WHEN I LOSE TIME AFTER TIME, PRESIDENTIAL RACE AFTER CNN INTERNSHIP, AFTER NBC JOB, AFTER RISK GAME! WHY DOES HE HAVE SUCCESS AFTER SUCCESS, AND WIN WIN WIN!!! AND WHY DID I HELP HIM WITH MY DARN LETTER!!
These sinful emotions which are completely wrong basically boil down to 1 question, what am I doing wrong, that nothing works out for me? I'm Jobless, friendless, brainless, and generally speaking, less. I feel woefully inadequate for anything I attempt, and effectively prove it to myself and everyone else by losing each and every time. Perhaps there is merit to not even trying? It's worked for 5 generations of Cunninghams before me.
Nick describes himself as follows: "College Freshman. Motivated, determined, passionate. Patriotic.
Opinionated. Over-extended. Like to have a good time, love laughing.
The beach is my favorite place. Picky. Adventurous. Hate wasting time.
Italian. Enjoy the city. Big dreams, little patience."
Of that list, we really only share a few points in common: like to have a good time, love laughing, and big dreams. Perhaps it is the rest of the list that I need to work on. Determined, passionate, adventurous. Those are adjectives that do not describe me.
So while I struggle to trust God for a summer job that isn't materializing and a career that seems impossible at this rate of failure, I'm reminded of the countless scriptures that speak to God's faithfulness, and while they don't always help emotionally, a life ruled by emotions, like mine is presently, is a life not trusting in the certainty and solidity of God's promise of eternal faithfulness. Why can't I seem to take Him at his word. Ouff. As always, I remain a sinner in need of grace.
If you were interested, below is my letter of recommendation regarding Nick, the more I read it, the more I see problems with it, but also, the more I think it truly is a spectacular letter. Perhaps I could go into business? haha.
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April 15, 2008
To Whom It May Concern:
Scott Adams once wrote, “You don't have to be a "person
of influence" to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in
my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.” Nick Troiano is just such an influential
person.
Over the last year I have had the opportunity to observe
Nick as a Senator in our Student Government and have been extremely impressed
by his whole-hearted stand for principle, rationality, and good judgment. As the most outspoken conservative thinker in
the Senate, Nick has challenged the default assumption that liberal philosophies
should be accepted and immediately implemented simply because they “sound good”. Nick has forced his colleagues to think about
crucial issues and consider all the possible unintended consequences of blindly
following the popular opinion.
The most prominent example of this is that of the hotly
contested smoking bill, which would request the University establish a clear
smoking policy on campus. Though faced
with a hostile senate and passionate, outspoken opposition, Nick stayed true to
his convictions risking the hatred of his peers to tirelessly shepherd the bill
to both passage, and veto override. The
bill was hotly contested because Nick dared to publicly suggest that a policy
was needed, not simply a courtesy campaign.
Nick may not be considered an influential person by some people, but his
commitment to his ideals, and his willingness to work extremely hard to see
those ideals realized, is truly an example to me, one that I am trying to apply
even now.
I do not consider myself much of a manager; however, Nick
has provided an indispensable example of a courageous political leader in the
face of fierce opposition. He is also a
leader who takes initiative to get things done.
Last fall, Nick orchestrated a weekend trip down to South Carolina to campaign for Governor
Huckabee. During our trip, Nick worked
hard pursuing excellence in every task he was assigned. This commitment to excellence isn’t something
many people would consider a hallmark of an influential person, however, it is
one of the many traits that I admire most about Nick, and am seeking to improve
in my own life.
In my three years at college, and the 18 years prior to
that, I have been fortunate to see in my friends many admirable character
traits which make them not only worth knowing and learning from, but also make
them beneficial to society. Nick’s
passion, commitment to excellence, and strong leadership skills serve as influential
examples to me and many others. Of the
few people whose careers I will be watching with great anticipation, Nick is
undoubtedly at the top of the list. I
consider it a privilege to count him as a colleague, but more importantly, as a
friend.
Jason
J. Cunningham
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Myself, and Nick, at The Founder's Day Ball back in February - back when I wasn't a failure.
